For the past few weeks I’ve been slowly making my way through Parenting is Heart Work by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller. Just as the title suggests, the book teaches parents why and how to make heart connections with their children. Many parents, myself included, are too quick to correct behavior and neglect to correct and mold the inner heart issue.
Parenting is Heart Work Review
Being a large family, it is easy to get caught up in the happenings of daily life and not take the time to connect with the children when bad behavior occurs. When the kids get to arguing or fussing in the other room, it’s so much more convenient to shout out a quick, “Stop it!” and get back to whatever it is I’m doing. However, I’ve learned that this quick correcting of the outward behavior can lead to bigger problems.
As Parenting is Heart Work puts it…” Teenage rebellion doesn’t start at age thirteen; it starts much earlier, in a young child’s heart.”
I am very thankful to have two teenage children (thirteen and sixteen) who are amazingly helpful, thoughtful and in general… just really good kids. How they came out that way is beyond me. I’ve been behavior parenting pretty much from the beginning. Somehow… by the grace of God, these two have turned into godly teens. We are a first generation Christian family, so the bigs weren’t brought up in church like my littles are.
Through reading Parenting is Heart Work, I’ve realized the importance of taking time to connect with the kids on heart levels and weeding out the issues that have taken root. I used to be a lecturer. I would rant and rave until I was red in the face and my bigs were glassy-eyed and obviously not paying attention. Over the years I’ve learned that lecturing simply does not work with kids, no matter the age. It just goes in one ear and out the other.
After reading and slowly implementing it’s suggestions, can I tell you that I have witnessed a difference in the kids? Specifically in my four year old, Max. Max is stubborn, head-strong, and unfortunately suffers from the condition known as selective hearing. I have seen my sweet little guy come almost 360 degrees to transform into a well-mannered, listening, and conscientious guy.
The book is divided into four parts:
- Understanding the heart
- Connecting with your child’s heart
- Working out heart change
- Touching your child’s heart
Each part takes you through the steps of connecting with your child where it matters the most, the heart.
This is one book that I plan to reread annually. There is so much wisdom to glean from these pages, it can hardly be all taken in with one reading.
You can find Parenting is Heart Work on Amazon, in stores and many other online retailors.